Interpersonal Relationships

 This week, when learning about interpersonal relationships through Knapp's model, I began to ask "How am I apart from other people?". This moment came specifically during the "Differentiating stage of the model, and reminded me of a close friendship that started my freshman year of college. At first, we shared EVERYTHING. Classes, hobbies, and weekend plans. As we moved through our different majors and personal priorities, the growing differences between us became hard to ignore. The influence of online communication made it seemingly more complicated. 

We went from texting constantly and tagging each other in instagram posts to barely replying to each other's messages. What was once light-hearted and daily began feeling forced. We each curated different online identities. She leaned into art and animals, while I kept things light and centered around sports and music. These differences seemed to create space for misunderstandings and silence, instead of strengthening our bond through diversity. 

Networked communication allows individuals to perform multiple versions of themselves depending on the platform and audience. This flexibility can be empowering, but also disorienting when trying to maintain consistent interpersonal identities (McEwan, 2015). In our case, digital spaces exaggerated our differences by making them feel more permanent than they might've seemed in person. 

Looking back, I realize we weren't necessarily incompatible, but the constant visibility and performance of our evolving selves online accelerated our movement through the Differentiating stage. We started seeing each other as individuals, instead of a "we". That realization didn't necessarily have to be negative, but without open communication, it created distance that we didn't know how to cross. 

Creating Bonds: Knapp's Relationship Development Model

McEwan, B. (2015). Navigating new media networks: Understanding and managing communication challenges in a networked society. Lexington Books.